The longer you drag it out the worse it'll end up for both of you. That feeling that you need her and the situation as a whole (especially with her seemingly feeling the same way or at least very similarly) is called toxic love and won't ever do you any favours
Give this page a read, it's good for explaining what you're experiencing and how to try to get yourself out of the entanglement, which you ought to do asap because feeling low is just one of many ailments you can be afflicted with due to this sort of relationship