Cyber bullying

[Catzsy]

There has been many postive outcomes with the growth of the world wide web with global communication being vastly improved, mobile phones, portable devices etc. Unfortunately it also seems to have a very negative side. I was reading about the suicide at 13 of a girl not too far away from me and she left a letter saying it as because of bullying via the internet & mobile phones.

There are organisations online that are there to support so there must be a recognised problem.
Link:
http://bullyonline.org/related/cyber.htm

Do you think though that it is over publicised and encourages others to
basically 'join in'? Or is too much just made of this? Also why does a cyber bully do it?

[Mathew]

Cyber Bullying doesn't really bother me. It's all letters on a screen.

It can't hurt you unless you LET it hurt you. If you take it as an insult, it's GOING to insult you. If you take it with a pinch of salt and ignore it, why should it bother you?

Once the "bully" tracks me down I'd be cautious, but until then - its pointless.
I do think once someone sees a group of "bullies", they would feel safer and more at ease if they joined them rather than went against them. Stupidly, why should there be sides anyway?

Interesting topic.

[efq]

Anybody who cyberbullying has broke the law. It is now illegal to cyberbully and if you are getting cyberbullied then you give them chatlogs and who it is and they will come to you and go to them. You say 'It's all letters on a screen' but if you get that for weeks/months on end, constantly getting laughed at, insulted it will take its toll.

I was shown this a few years ago. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNumIY9D7uY Watch it ALL because it does send a message.

[FlyingJesus]

It's quite funny and sometimes I think it's necessary to let people know what they're really like instead of sugarcoating everything and making the weak and ugly think they're great and pretty - they won't survive in the real world with false opinions of themselves

[Immenseman]

Some people genuinely deserve it though, it's harsh but it's the truth. We live in a society where we're pushed into thinking there are "winners and losers". That's a western mentality and unless you change wider society you aren't ever going to eradicate cyber bullying.

Also, people who take it to heart, really shouldn't. For example, you're getting abused on MSN - you have the option to block the person. A social networking site, you have the option to remove the person from viewing your page. Mobile phone, you can block their number. Email, you can block their email.

I'm not really sure how to define bullying either. I argue with people which may lead to me insulting them, is that bullying? Maybe it is but I think the stereotypical bully is some hardened villain, something which I certainly am not, even if I wanted to be, I couldn't.

Supposedly insulting someone is bullying. Then surely 90% of people on the internet have bullied someone else and have thus broken the law. Yes, cyber bullying does happen but if people take it to heart then it's their own fault really. They have the power to remove the bullies away from their cyber world and if they don't decide to do this and let the bullying continue and let it drag them down then the finger of blame is pointing directly at them in my opinion.

People are always going to say things on the internet - people have said things to me they wouldn't dare say in real life in a serious manner. Does that mean I've been cyber bullied? Technically, yes. Almost everyone has been insulted on the internet, does that mean we've all been bullied... :eusa_wall if you take it to heart, you deserve it. End of.

[efq]

It's not ALL about just over the internet. It's mainly people near you or around you who are cyberbullying you, say as in college or school.

It's different when someone says to you over the internet who you don't know goes 'I will kill you/beat you up' than where someone you know has a bad reputation for stuff like that goes 'I will kill you/beat you up'.

People don't kill themselves so easily but it gets to much at times, threatening to kill someone (with proof, so chatlogs etc) can and likely will get you arrested, there ain't so many because people don't tell people or just ignore it.

I have never been properly cyberbullied. Yeah people swear at me online whatever but thats nothing when its someone you know doing it. If someone I knew did, I would just take the proof right to the police and see how much they laugh then.

A common statement: 'Laugh at it and your part of it'

[Immenseman]

It's not ALL about just over the internet. It's mainly people near you or around you who are cyberbullying you, say as in college or school.

It's different when someone says to you over the internet who you don't know goes 'I will kill you/beat you up' than where someone you know has a bad reputation for stuff like that goes 'I will kill you/beat you up'.

People don't kill themselves so easily but it gets to much at times, threatening to kill someone (with proof, so chatlogs etc) can and likely will get you arrested, there ain't so many because people don't tell people or just ignore it.

I have never been properly cyberbullied. Yeah people swear at me online whatever but thats nothing when its someone you know doing it. If someone I knew did, I would just take the proof right to the police and see how much they laugh then.

A common statement: 'Laugh at it and your part of it'

If that was true and the majority of people who get cyber bullied are by people who they actually know in real life than that person is obviously scared about doing it face to face so resorts to the internet. If that was the case then surely everyone would realise it was nothing sincere because they're a crap bully, lol.

If it was someone at college doing it, they'd be ripped to shreds anyway, bullying is one thing but cyber bullying someone you actually know in real life is something else. Regardless of who they were, and their popularity if everyone found out they cyber bullied other people from college they'd soon be getting criticised by everyone around them.

[AlexOC]

I think it's strange how people get all worked up about it, Like when im playing on Fifa and someone wins me and they send a message like "hahaha your ****" it dosent make me bat and eyelid, let alone become really upset about it.

Like most people, ive had lots of people swear at me and try to insult me, luckily i just laugh it off.

[lBlue]

i get bullied in the sports section by plastics. :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(

[e5]

Some people see it and find it a joke, therfore join in after hearing about cyber bullying. Generally, there is just arse holes out who do things without thinking of the consequences, or do, but not the right ones, and I've never actually seen someone take not of anti-cyber bullying websites if I am totally honest ;/ - Bullies don't like to lose street cred or whatever so won't listen to sites and do it more to act even cool - Fact.

[Pixet]

Obviously little things wouldn't bother me because the chances are, it's people you'll never meet. And they're usually less 'popular' or whatever than you. But if someone's practically hounding you and properly won't leave you alone, then it starts to get annoying. But tbh I don't actually care. The fact people spend all their time online being mean to people shows how pathetic they are.

[dogboy123]

I don't think I can ever see myself being bullied. In the end if their the bully and your the victim you're always going to be better than they are, so Id either ignore it or just pwn them left right and center.

To kill yourself over cyber bullying is shocking, as it's in my opinion so easy to get rid of, and I think people need to realise. Just suppose some people can't handle it, and I hope the bullys who are doing it now get the message.

[lBlue]

I don't think I can ever see myself being bullied. In the end if their the bully and your the victim you're always going to be better than they are, so Id either ignore it or just pwn them left right and center.

To kill yourself over cyber bullying is shocking, as it's in my opinion so easy to get rid of, and I think people need to realise. Just suppose some people can't handle it, and I hope the bullys who are doing it now get the message.
u sure u dnt get bullied?

[Catzsy]

It's quite funny and sometimes I think it's necessary to let people know what they're really like instead of sugarcoating everything and making the weak and ugly think they're great and pretty - they won't survive in the real world with false opinions of themselves

I think this is pretty interesting because it in a sense mimics the animal world
- survival of the fittest. Are you saying that bullying on a level is necessary to enlighten people ? Are you saying that you would rather give a truthful opion if they ask and if so how candid are you? What are your perceptions of what is ugly and what is weak too?


i get bullied in the sports section by plastics. :(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(

What are plastics? :P

[lBlue]

What are plastics? :P
Plastics - A football "fan" who claims to support a club they have no connection to apart from Sky Sports 1 and Match Of The Day.

[AlexOC]

Most plastics tend to suggest they support Manchester United, even though they have never seen them play nor could name more than 1 player.

[Callum.]

Plastics - A football "fan" who claims to support a club they have no connection to apart from Sky Sports 1 and Match Of The Day.

good thing i watch some champions league matches on itv though!

[FlyingJesus]

Some people see it and find it a joke, therfore join in after hearing about cyber bullying. Generally, there is just arse holes out who do things without thinking of the consequences, or do, but not the right ones, and I've never actually seen someone take not of anti-cyber bullying websites if I am totally honest ;/ - Bullies don't like to lose street cred or whatever so won't listen to sites and do it more to act even cool - Fact.

tbh most of the people I know who seriously bully others do it just for fun and honestly aren't trying to look cool - it's generally the ones you mention before that (who join in afterwards and just follow it along) that are trying too hard. Exceptions occur in both cases of course as with anything


In the end if their the bully and your the victim you're always going to be better than they are

In what way? Bullies by nature pick on the weak, so the victims can't be that much better. What you seem to be describing is the old "they bully you because they're jealous!" argument that parents and teachers so love. I would honestly say that it's a small minority of "bullies" who do it out of some type of jealousy or insecurity


I think this is pretty interesting because it in a sense mimics the animal world
- survival of the fittest. Are you saying that bullying on a level is necessary to enlighten people ? Are you saying that you would rather give a truthful opion if they ask and if so how candid are you? What are your perceptions of what is ugly and what is weak too?

I do believe in survival of the fittest to an extent because I wholeheartedly disagree with the theory that everyone is equal in any way. My truthful opinion is generally given and I don't have much problem with it because the company I keep can either take it (which I view as a strength anyway as you shouldn't ask if you're not prepared to take an answer) or wouldn't be subject to aesthetic criticism. If they want an opinion on something they've worked on, of course I'll be truthful because either they're not a friend so I don't care or they are a friend and I don't want them to do things badly. That ties in with your enlightenment question to which I'd say yes, critique is certainly needed in order to grow, and sometimes it can't be dealt with nicely

[GommeInc]

I don't understand it - the block button is there for a reason on MSN and on forums you either leave or tell the webmaster (HA!) to deal with them :S Is this cyberbullying from people you actually know, or people you don't know? Or both? Because both can easily be avoided, and I don't see how it can constantly happen :/

[Hecktix]

In all honesty nobody should make personal comments about someone online because at the end of the day you don't know someone until you've personally met them.

You can form opinions online however they are strictly online opinions however a lot of cyberbullying is personal and turns about appearance etc just like normal bullying which is unacceptable really.

Wherever you go in life there will be bullying but what I do get confused with, with cyber bullying is that all websites have a form of block/harassment reporting system which people can use so simply?

Even this forum has an ignore list function... it needs using more often.

[Black_Apalachi]

I didn't really realise cyber-bullying was an actual big issue. My only experiences of it (if any) would be users on the forum who are always known for spamming or just being unconstructive with everything they post and therefore get laughed at and flamed about everything they do on the forum.

However I haven't seen this very often; I can only recall two users (one I don't remember the name of) from quite a few years ago who I could probably label as a "victim" of this. One of them still uses the forum but in a much more constructive manor and seems to fit in very well now.

My perception of face-to-face bullying doesn't really reflect this though. I see it more as someone being hassled in some way, no matter how "minor", on a regular basis - also regardless of how they take it.

I could probably go as far as to say I was bullied in a non-stereotypical kind of way where I'd be the one who people kind of "blamed" all the time. I can't explain it because it was never serious and people were always joking. But I think it came about purely because I didn't care and I'm able to laugh things off. If I was more emotional and took things to heart it probably would have effected me - but then again it wouldn't have happened. So perhaps that's not even bullying after all :P.

Anyway...


Anybody who cyberbullying has broke the law. It is now illegal to cyberbully and if you are getting cyberbullied then you give them chatlogs and who it is and they will come to you and go to them. [...]

I don't understand how that can be effective for a few reasons. Firstly kids could reporting things left right and centre but as I mentioned above, from what I've seen e-bullying comes about over time by the "victim's" constant spamming etc. and when they get -rep they're just like 'hahaha do you think I care?' etc. So basically anything reported by a user like this would be completely taken out of context with no proof of what the original context was. The other major flaw is that chat logs can just be created?


Some people genuinely deserve it though, it's harsh but it's the truth. [...]

I agree with that whole post but just keeping the quote short. That piece of the quote is exactly what I'm saying. Also yes, you're not forced to stay on the internet. Well, you don't have to even go off the internet - if you're being bullied on MSN, just block them as Jake says or if it's on any website, you've got thousands of others to use which are essentially the same thing.

The point about them knowing the bully in real life makes sense because why on Earth would you stalk someone all over the internet just to "bully" them? I can imagine if they knew them in real life they'd have some idea of what sites they go on which would make the whole stalking thing a bit easier. Plus, I think being able to see the effects it has on them in real life is part of the bully's results.

Anyway, in those kind of cases, I imagine the main bullying happens in school and it's just when they've gone home they carry on via the internet. In this context I think face-to-face bullying vs cyber-bullying is irrelevant. It's just bullying by whatever means is available at the time and therefore should be treated the same.



Most plastics tend to suggest they support Manchester United, even though they have never seen them play nor could name more than 1 player.

Like Ussain Bolt? :P

[Catzsy]

tbh most of the people I know who seriously bully others do it just for fun and honestly aren't trying to look cool - it's generally the ones you mention before that (who join in afterwards and just follow it along) that are trying too hard. Exceptions occur in both cases of course as with anything



In what way? Bullies by nature pick on the weak, so the victims can't be that much better. What you seem to be describing is the old "they bully you because they're jealous!" argument that parents and teachers so love. I would honestly say that it's a small minority of "bullies" who do it out of some type of jealousy or insecurity



I do believe in survival of the fittest to an extent because I wholeheartedly disagree with the theory that everyone is equal in any way. My truthful opinion is generally given and I don't have much problem with it because the company I keep can either take it (which I view as a strength anyway as you shouldn't ask if you're not prepared to take an answer) or wouldn't be subject to aesthetic criticism. If they want an opinion on something they've worked on, of course I'll be truthful because either they're not a friend so I don't care or they are a friend and I don't want them to do things badly. That ties in with your enlightenment question to which I'd say yes, critique is certainly needed in order to grow, and sometimes it can't be dealt with nicely

There is great incite in this post and I agree with 99% of it. Having watched the Xfactor last night you can see that some do grow up with unrealistic expectations & over inflated opinions of what their talents are which they seem to have no real perception of themselves because their friends and family have not sat down with them and told them the reality of it. I don't agree though that somebody should make assumptions with people that they don't actually know in irl and also make comments that are much beyond the acceptable and are just personal insults really. Constructive criticism is essential to allow people to mature but too much negative criticism is going to take all their self -esteem and this could be damaging. I feel that parents should speak to their children about these issues 'in case' it happens. Quite often the bullied becomes the bully because of negative experiences that they have had.

[ifuseekamy]

There is great incite in this post and I agree with 99% of it. Having watched the Xfactor last night you can see that some do grow up with unrealistic expectations & over inflated opinions of what their talents are which they seem to have no real perception of themselves because their friends and family have not sat down with them and told them the reality of it. I don't agree though that somebody should make assumptions with people that they don't actually know in irl and also make comments that are much beyond the acceptable and are just personal insults really. Constructive criticism is essential to allow people to mature but too much negative criticism is going to take all their self -esteem and this could be damaging. I feel that parents should speak to their children about these issues 'in case' it happens. Quite often the bullied becomes the bully because of negative experiences that they have had.
I also agree. It's kind of sad but a lot of times "bullying" is the only way that these people realise they aren't as good as they think they are. Whether they think they're sexy as hell or the greatest singer alive. I see so many youtube videos of people singing and genuinely thinking they're great, if you even try to give them constructive criticism they'll shrug you off. I find it's because they often have friends who big them up.

[N!ck]

People who are weak minded, stupid and gullible enough to be bullied over the internet probably shouldn't be using the internet for anything other than looking at static content.

[Feep]

I 'cyber bully' people because it's funny and they find it funny.

[Suspective]

If you watch that video though as posted earlier you might not find it funny, cyber bullying isn't just some person bullying you online. It can be people you know, sending you abuse over and over again.

It can ruin someones life, people have turned suicidal, in some cases ended their lives. It isn't really funny, if you think about it.

I'd hate to be bullied countless times, and humiliated in front of people you trust.

[Niall!]

There is great incite in this post and I agree with 99% of it. Having watched the Xfactor last night you can see that some do grow up with unrealistic expectations & over inflated opinions of what their talents are which they seem to have no real perception of themselves because their friends and family have not sat down with them and told them the reality of it. I don't agree though that somebody should make assumptions with people that they don't actually know in irl and also make comments that are much beyond the acceptable and are just personal insults really. Constructive criticism is essential to allow people to mature but too much negative criticism is going to take all their self -esteem and this could be damaging. I feel that parents should speak to their children about these issues 'in case' it happens. Quite often the bullied becomes the bully because of negative experiences that they have had.

Well, you argue about to much negative criticism can destroy self esteem, but sometimes, very rarely, it's needed. A guy I knew thought he could be a model, and to be quite frank, he was horrible. We all told him this, straight to his face. He bounced back saying we were all liars and that nothing could stop him becoming a model. He applied for every modelling agency he knew of, and they all rejected him. He was diagnosed with depression after that and I think it ruined his life.
Keeping at him would have stopped this stupid mistake and maybe have made him care about his schoolwork instead of chasing an unrealistic dream.

[Catzsy]

Well, you argue about to much negative criticism can destroy self esteem, but sometimes, very rarely, it's needed. A guy I knew thought he could be a model, and to be quite frank, he was horrible. We all told him this, straight to his face. He bounced back saying we were all liars and that nothing could stop him becoming a model. He applied for every modelling agency he knew of, and they all rejected him. He was diagnosed with depression after that and I think it ruined his life.
Keeping at him would have stopped this stupid mistake and maybe have made him care about his schoolwork instead of chasing an unrealistic dream.

Its sounds to me as if you were trying to do the best you could there. It's a shame he just didn't heed the advice.

[Niall!]

Its sounds to me as if you were trying to do the best you could there. It's a shame he just didn't heed the advice.

Well I wasn't really trying to help him, at the time it was more to make fun of him. But looking back on it, I suppose you could say that.

[9y]

There isnt enough made about this, It happens every day, people think its too much of a small thing to be bothered about, "its just online, what are they gonna do, Throw a url at you?" But its a really big issue that needs to be solved.

[GommeInc]

There isnt enough made about this, It happens every day, people think its too much of a small thing to be bothered about, "its just online, what are they gonna do, Throw a url at you?" But its a really big issue that needs to be solved.
What do cyber bullies do? Because I'd like to know, because if I was in a bullied situation, I'd click the block button on MSN, not add the idiots as friends on Myspace or Facebook, or not be so over-emotional and uptight :/

[UKIP]

I think if you're being bullied on the web, the common sense approach would be to turn the thing off, get outside and get some real mates.

[NIKKEE]

What a bunch of ***** a lot of you are. Cyber bullying is a terrible thing.
Who's talking about making a few jokes on msn or online gaming?
Stop going on about the block button on msn, because if it's someone you know of had been your friend, then it's a horrible thing, and if it starts out on the internet, it can easily carry on into real life. God, I'm sure no one gives a **** if someone they don't know makes a flippant comment over the internet. It's when you know someone and they turn on you like that.
What do you all mean, by some people need to be bullied? Telling some dumb ass that he is just that, isn't really bullying if they're a nasty person in the first place.
It's a different thing if you're some little quiet person who wouldn't hurt a fly, and people are saying horrible things to you on the internet. It's easy access and your easily available. It's overwhelming and horrible and it bloody well ruins lives, real or cyber bullying.
Little things like one out of the blue comment can grow and expand into a whole bunch of people doing it, people are easily influenced by others and not just that, people are bloody horrible. Especially at a young age, as proven by some of these posts.
Christ, you're acting as if the victim is the one in the wrong and they deserve it.

[GommeInc]

What a bunch of ***** a lot of you are. Cyber bullying is a terrible thing.
Who's talking about making a few jokes on msn or online gaming?
Stop going on about the block button on msn, because if it's someone you know of had been your friend, then it's a horrible thing, and if it starts out on the internet, it can easily carry on into real life. God, I'm sure no one gives a **** if someone they don't know makes a flippant comment over the internet. It's when you know someone and they turn on you like that.
What do you all mean, by some people need to be bullied? Telling some dumb ass that he is just that, isn't really bullying if they're a nasty person in the first place.
It's a different thing if you're some little quiet person who wouldn't hurt a fly, and people are saying horrible things to you on the internet. It's easy access and your easily available. It's overwhelming and horrible and it bloody well ruins lives, real or cyber bullying.
Little things like one out of the blue comment can grow and expand into a whole bunch of people doing it, people are easily influenced by others and not just that, people are bloody horrible. Especially at a young age, as proven by some of these posts.
Christ, you're acting as if the victim is the one in the wrong and they deserve it.
It really is as simple as ignoring it :/ Bullies are usually pathetic people who can easily be ignored. If you know them in real life, tell someone? Not very hard :/ You don't even have to hang around with them, or at least reason with them rather than sobbing in the corner sucombing to the bullies and letting it take control.

If you are a quite person, then surely you should acknowledge that they're the stupid ones and not you? Unless they're bullying with a reason, then you should are, but usually bullies don't, other than when you're playing the cry baby :/

Cyber bullying means a wide range of things, and one of them is when people you really do not know bully you, and that's the easiest type of bullying to avoid, unless your the sort of person who loves to be bullied :P

[NIKKEE]

It really is as simple as ignoring it :/ Bullies are usually pathetic people who can easily be ignored. If you know them in real life, tell someone? Not very hard :/ You don't even have to hang around with them, or at least reason with them rather than sobbing in the corner sucombing to the bullies and letting it take control.

If you are a quite person, then surely you should acknowledge that they're the stupid ones and not you? Unless they're bullying with a reason, then you should are, but usually bullies don't, other than when you're playing the cry baby :/

Cyber bullying means a wide range of things, and one of them is when people you really do not know bully you, and that's the easiest type of bullying to avoid, unless your the sort of person who loves to be bullied :P

I didn't deny that people are stupid and dumb for bullying people for no reason, I'm sure people are smart enough to know that. But knowing that doesn't make it any easier, especially if these people are known for being a bully in real life or their remarks are very viscious.
And if people are crying cause they're bullied, I would hardly make fun of that. Quite a nasty thing to do.
And I acknowledged the fact that it's no big deal to be bullied by people you don't know and will never meet in real life.

[Jord]

They do It to act cool infront of there e-friends, :x Its pathetic if you ask me..

[FlyingJesus]

Christ, you're acting as if the victim is the one in the wrong and they deserve it.

I do believe this, yes

[Feep]

Bullying in any form is wrong...

But any idiot that kills them selves rather than clicking the block button or deleting them from their freinds list is a fool.

[angotheman]

Cyber bullying doesn't bother me much i mean its a computer, not like there actualy bullying you, if you do get cyber bullied no point in letting it ruin your life just block them and go out with your irl mates or w/e

[9y]

What do cyber bullies do? Because I'd like to know, because if I was in a bullied situation, I'd click the block button on MSN, not add the idiots as friends on Myspace or Facebook, or not be so over-emotional and uptight :/

People can make Hate Sites and spread them around with stuff about you. You cant just block that.

[GommeInc]

People can make Hate Sites and spread them around with stuff about you. You cant just block that.
You can, you get in contact with the host. Besides, if someone did that to me, then I'd be seriously worried about their mental health :P Wasting that amount of money to prove absolutely nothing other than small, trivial things (which most bullying revolves around. Unless you murdered someone, then you probably deserve it :P

[FlyingJesus]

Nothing trivial about people being ugly

[VirtualG]

Nothing trivial about people being ugly
Your an ass. So much for Christian ethics, ey?