depression

[Shar]

I have relapses from time to time but I'm so proud of myself each time I manage to get through it. It's never easy.

[Prosiary]

Diagnosed, finding it hard to manage it along with my anxiety, in the middle of therapy which I haven't felt an effect from yet though.

[despect]

Diagnosed, finding it hard to manage it along with my anxiety, in the middle of therapy which I haven't felt an effect from yet though.

From what you told me before it should be going on for longer and it should if it does go on longer start taking effect. Sometimes it does take a while but it will happen!

[Futz]

I'm not sure, I'm reluctant to call what I experience depression because I wouldn't want to wrongly compare it to people who know they have depression.

My experience with the closest thing to depression is that a feeling of nothingness/void comes and goes every few months for me since I was like 16. Before that, I feel like I was just happy being a kid.

For a few months I'll be what I deem my normal self, I'll have positive and negative experiences but I'm overall just content and okay, I can react emotionally to events with a range of emotions like anger, happiness, sadness.

But then the next few months I'll feel just indifferent about everything, it's kind of like a feeling of nothingness, a void, like you're not really a full person and you need that to be filled to go back to being okay and actually feeling anything. This feeling makes it extremely difficult to do anything you know in your head you want to do but you don't have the mindset or the motivation to do it.

It's annoying because it'll make me stop doing things I love doing, I like recording/editing videos, riding my motorbike, play guitar, playing video games, be good at my job/put effort into my uni work, watch series I love and read books I enjoy. When I start feeling empty inside, that seems to stop and I just end up on my laptop, staring at a blank browser.

At the minute I'm starting to feel okay again after feeling pretty dead since last August so I've started getting involved a bit more.

I have to say though, my friends are some of the best though and we all experience some level of this every now and then, we're all supportive of each other and do our best to get each other out of the dark.

I think the main thing that makes it manageable (for me) is that I know it will pass and I'll go back to being okay. Unfortunately, this sometimes isn't the case for some people and I think it's good to find someone to talk to/get help.

xx